by Miriam Knight January 21, 2010
Suzanne Jauchius’s memoir about growing up with an abusive mother and having to hide her impressive psychic abilities from her and a string of equally abusive husbands was like a soap opera. It was addictive - every page brought a new melodrama, so you keep reading compulsively to find out what happens next. You want to shake her as she ruefully admits to one bad choice after another, but you cheer her on as she gropes her way out of a prolonged dark night of the soul towards the light of self knowledge and acceptance of herself and her gifts.
Writing such an intimate memoir was a courageous act and, I would guess, the culmination of her own healing process. I think the core messages of the book are ones that we can all take on board: there are no victims, only accomplices; connecting with the natural world is essential to grounding oneself; and finding community supports you in finding inner peace.
As a working psychic Suzanne takes great pride in her psychometric skills and ability to get messages from objects and situations, which she has validated in a wide range of police cases and readings. She is a bit dismissive of the fuzzy emotional impressions of many new age psychics. I suspect that this view is colored by her own history of hiding her emotions and talents from her critics as a defense mechanism.
Anyone who has hidden or suppressed their own intuitive abilities out of fear of ridicule or worse can resonate with her struggle for validation. Ultimately, however, the psychic aspect of the story is only a byplay in her struggle to find validation and acceptance as a human being.
The lessons she learns the hard way are universal, and the fundamental one is that we can’t find ourselves in the eyes of others. We must do the inner work of erasing the tapes of our childhood, and releasing the baggage that has kept us from being whole and vibrant and joyful. Suzanne was lucky enough to have found some wonderful mentors along the way, and this book may be her way of paying their kindness forward. In any event, it’s a darn good read.